This is the test log for SCP-591, performed by Research Team 256, Headed by Dr. ███████.
Log entries should be entered in the following format:
Date: Date of experiment
Sample: "Title of song", Artist
Results: Any noteworthy effects.
To determine the limits of SCP-591's capabilities, a number of musical experiments were conducted using examples from several different music genres. All test subjects stated their lack of skill in any form of dance.
Sample: "The Blue Danube", Johan Strauss II
Results: Dr. ██████ reported that this was the loveliest waltz she'd danced in a long time, and thanked a slightly embarassed Dr. █████ for the privilege.
Sample: "Stayin' Alive", The Bee Gees
Results: Dr. ██████ was observed to engage in some rhythmic and well-executed disco dancing, but had to be taken to the infirmary shortly after attempting to sling around his lab coat by the collar, with limited success. Note to self: Requisition two new desk lamps and a chair from Supplies.
Sample: "Thriller", Michael Jackson
Results: All participants involved denied any previous ability to dance, but nonetheless engaged in a very well-co-ordinated recreation of the dancing zombie routine.
Sample: "Objection (Tango)", Shakira
Results: [DATA EXPUNGED]. The joker responsible for slipping this one into the experiment queue will be held personally responsible for Dr. █████'s dislocated hip, and we will find out who posted the resultant video to YouTube.
Sample: "Weapon of Choice", Fatboy Slim
Results: Dr. ████████ displayed previously unknown agility and softshoe skills, but suffered an injury while trying to perform a back flip.
Sample: "Toxic", Britney Spears
Results: [DATA EXPUNGED]. DEAR GOD NO. Let's not do that again. EVER. Additionally, Dr. █████ would like you to forget that she did any of that.
Sample: "Rotting Fetus Skull [EXPLETIVE REDACTED]", Death [EXPLETIVE REDACTED] 9000k
Results: [DATA EXPUNGED], resulting in three injuries and one fatality. In the future, let's test death metal only with D-class personnel, to prevent any more incidents like this.
Sample: "I'm A Little Teapot", Unknown
Results: A lot of very grumpy teapots for about three and a half hours. Additionally, the individual responsible to turning on the Loop function on SCP-591 was punched in the face by the Lead Teapot Researcher.
Sample: "What Is Love?", Haddaway
Results: Six researchers were taken to the infirmary for repetitive stress injuries to the neck. All on the same side, too. Odd.
Sample: "Canned Heat", Jamiroquai
Results: Dr. ████ received a small round of applause for his flawless rendition of the Napoleon Dynamite dance. We're not sure where that came from.